Ideas for · 2 min read · updated

Gifts for dads who say they don't want anything

He doesn't want anything. He will, however, wear a hat that says he's a member of the Thermostat Yacht Club until it falls apart.

The short answer

Make it about the one thing he always does: an embroidered dad hat for a fake yacht club named after his habit, his year printed as a heavy metal tour on the back of a tee, or a flag for the made-up nation of his garage.

The picks

  1. A stone dad hat embroidered with Reply All Yacht Club, Est. 2019 and a shield, made with The Club
    Hats

    The Club

    A fake yacht club for his one habit, with a crest and a faux-Latin motto, embroidered on what is literally called a dad hat.

    Makes: Embroidered hat, beanie or patch

  2. A faded black tee printed with a flaming skeleton doing taxes and The Tax Season Tour, made with The Tour of Your Life
    Things to wear

    The Tour of Your Life

    His year as a heavy metal tour on the back of a black tee, with a footnote like No refunds. Literally.

    Makes: T-shirt

  3. A navy, teal and yellow flag with a star on a flagpole, made with Flag Foundry
    Puzzles & flags

    Flag Foundry

    Found the nation of his garage, design its flag with him, and give him the 3 x 5 ft one to fly over the workbench.

    Makes: Flag

  4. A big head pillow of a man's face in red and yellow halftone with a #1 DAD ribbon, made with Big Head
    Pillows

    Big Head

    His giant head as a pillow cut to his outline, with #1 DAD or WORLD'S OKAYEST DAD on the ribbon.

    Makes: Shaped pillow

  5. A hot dog shaped pillow with a white edge, made with Big Snack
    Pillows

    Big Snack

    His usual order, the one he's had since 1994, as one giant pillow cut along the food.

    Makes: Shaped pillow, stickers, magnets

Find his one thing

Every dad has a bit. He guards the thermostat, he narrates parking, he says the restaurant was better before. Type it into The Club and it founds three fake clubs for it, each with a name, a faux-Latin motto with its meaning, a founding year and an emblem. Pick one, edit anything, and it's embroidered on a classic dad hat in up to four thread colours.

The hat comes in 11 colours, and every design is checked against the embroidery rules before it can be ordered, so the stitching comes out clean.

If he'll pretend to hate it

  • His year as a tour: THE DAD BOD WORLD TOUR, with dates like the garage reorganization and the gutter incident.
  • His giant head as a pillow, white border, with #1 DAD on the ribbon.
  • His usual order, exactly as he says it to the waiter, as one giant pillow.

Questions people ask

What do you get a dad who doesn't want anything?

Something about him that can't be bought anywhere else, like a hat for a fake club named after his favourite habit. It's a joke he gets to be in on.

Is the dad hat embroidered or printed?

Embroidered, in up to four thread colours, on the front of a classic dad hat. Beanies and a round patch are options too.

Can I add his name to the hat?

The club name is yours to edit, so you can name it after him, like the Gary Thermostat Yacht Club. Long names get set smaller or split, within the embroidery limits.